Work etiquette

OK, when your boss asks where so-and-so is and (s)he's not in yet, and you don't hate this person but are afraid to lie (sissy), do not say "He's not in yet."
Try: "His stuff is here but I don't know where he is." or "I just saw him a little while ago" (because you did - yesterday, last week, etc. - time is relative).
Also, when he is sneaking in late and you're in the office talking to the boss do NOT lean out of the door and say "Good Morning!" loudly to them.
Am I the only one who understands this?

Also, I just was in one of the elevators and it had that old man/old motor oil/ stale booze smell that I thought only existed in some dive bars during the late morning or early afternoon. It's heinous. I can't get it out of my nostrils.