Fuck Donald Sutherland

Yay! Our second in the series.
This one was inspired by the "Proust Questionnaire" in the back of Vanity Fair.
(Yeah, I know, what do you expect form something called the "Proust Questionnaire" but shutup or you'll be next in the series.)
His answer to every question just shows what a fucktard he is. Below are some of the questions and answers DS gave (my comment in bold). Obviously he's a sensitive intellectual that we should all admire greatly. Gah! I hate when entertainment monkeys think that because they can 'member all them lines and contort their faces in the right emotional expressions that they know shit from shit.

VF: What is your idea of perfect happiness?
DS: A peace pursuing government I can support.

Wow, that would give him total happiness. Not anything about loved ones or health or anything that non-pompus assholes usually say. I can see it now "My wife has cancer, all my friends hate me, and I'm destitute - but Ralph Nader's in office, I couldn't be happier!" Way to inject politics into everything, hippie.

VF: What historical figure do you most identify with?
DS: Dr. Norman Bethune.

Sweet baby Jesus. You (Donald Sutherland) identifies most with Bethune? Let's see, he's a legend in the medical field due to many advances he made, gave selflessly to those less fortunate, and risked his life during several wars to help his fellow man. All this after he almost died from TB.
You were in MASH.
I can see it.

VF: What living person do you most admire?
DS: Arundhati Roy.

Nice. Wow, an author that spent time in jail due to her defending her beliefs. I guess that's honorable. Wait, what's that? How long did she spend in jail? One day? And she's an anti-nuke protester in a huge democracy that doesn't kill and torture dissidents? And she's rich? Good job Donald! Way to slap all of the people fighting for rights in Iran, Cuba, Afghanistan, etc. etc. et-muthafuckin-c.

VF: What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
DS: The inability to fluently speak my wife's language.

Wow. that's your biggest problem? Oh Donnie, you're so sensitive. I hope my wife leaves me for you.

VF: Which talent would youmost like to have?
DS: Wit, as defined by Alexander Pope in "The Rape of the Lock."

Couldn't just leave it at something lame like "Wit." Had to make sure we knew he is really well-read. P.S. Fuck Pope.

VF: If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
DS: Their inheritance. By that, I mean, what we have done to the world we have borrowed from them.

This doesn't even make any sense. You borrowed the world from your family and they are inheriting it from you? What? I can't get this one to make sense.
Anyhoo, isn't it your generation that started fucking things up Donnie? You senile old prick.

VF: What is your favorite occupation?
DS: Imagining

I believe this one stands on its own.

VF: What is the quality you most like in a woman?
DS: Acuity.

Sigh. Could this be considered vaguely insulting towards women? Anyway. Friggin' awful answer. Everybody knows it's "Boobs."

VF: Who are your favorite writers?
DS: T.S. Eliot, Yeats, Joyce - the list goes on. Ayn Rand is not on it.

Oh no! Sutherland doesn't like Ayn Rand! I better burn my books. Why the fuck would you make a point that you don't like Ayn Rand. Especially after a turd-filled list like that.

How would you like to die?
DS: By my own hand, with those I love gathered around me drinking a fine Bordeaux rouge.

First off, I like his uneccessary use of French here by slapping the rouge on the end. He's soooo educated. Second, what the fuck is this? I'm sure that way of dying wouldn't be traumatic for anyone.
"C'mere little Timmy, wait, here's a dixie cup of a fine Bordeaux rouge. That means red Timmy. Yes I know it's kind of purple but it's called red. OK, where were we? Oh yes, I was going to slit my wrists and leave this mortal coil. See Timmy, the key to killing yourself right is to cut lengthwise, not across. Back up Timmy, otherwise you'll get grandads's bloodspray. Or maybe hit with one of my flailing limbs when I finally expire and convulse. Oh, here, put this vapo-rub under your nose for when grandad's bowels release. Yeah, I already tried to make a doodie but this warmongering government has got my GI tract tied up in knots. Did you know I was in MASH?"